Sex Tips for Men
In the movies, sex always looks great. But if you're like a lot of men, sex may not be as good as you think it could be. You might feel anxiety, concerns about your performance, or even self-consciousness about your body. No matter what the scenario, it just feels like you're not having sex as often as everyone else. Also see MagicMen online shop page which has everything adult shop related that you might need.
How's Your Sex Life?
An Ohio State University study found young men think about sex about 19 times per day (as compared to young women who think about it ten times daily). Despite it being on men's minds much of the time, men still remain confused about what great sex is, and how to have it. Men face both mental barriers and physical barriers to great sex. They may be plagued with self-doubt, and cling to myths and misperceptions about sex. Physically, many men could use some work on the mechanics of lovemaking.
Great sex is in the eye of the beholder, or the be-hander," says Patti Britton, a clinical sexologist and author of The Art of Sex Coaching. "For some men, it might be the ability to produce fantabulous multiple orgasms in their partner. For other men, it might mean being able to last three minutes. Being a great lover means becoming a great lover to your particular partner, and that requires doing something very difficult: opening your mouth." Check out out our Adult vibrator buy online page which has everything adult shop related that you might need.
Men may talk a good game when it comes to sex, but most don't think the sex they have is as good as it could be. The following slides are a guide to great sex, with six tips for more sexual pleasure. I've released hundreds of articles of sex advice through the years, and if you're new to my site, it can seem a bit overwhelming to sort through.
So today, I decided to do a best-of-the-best collection of my fifty sex tips for men.
My female readers will also benefit from many of these tips, but the focus is primarily on men.
Such guys. Do you want to build greater sexual stamina, please your partner more fully, enjoy more fulfilling sex, and feel more confident and energized day today?
Small hinges swing big doors. By putting in just a little bit of energy and attention towards your sex life, you can be experiencing the most deeply fulfilling sex than you've ever had. Without further ado, here are my fifty powerful sex tips for men.
No matter how proficient you think you are, now and then, you could use a little boost to improve your sex life and satisfy your partner. Try these simple, achievable sex tips with your lover tonight.
While weddings are all about celebrations, it is also one of those occasions where there is no escaping the stress—especially, the bride and the groom. Despite preparing for the event quite in advance, the D-Day might turn quite unpredictable. And when the much-anticipated wedding night arrives, the newly-weds get the first opportunity to know each other tightly. Excitement, coupled with the fear of the unexpected, can make anyone nervous. Especially men who had never spent intimate moments with a woman may definitely need some tips before his wedding night.
It's essential to know the person better and ask for consent
While you might be thinking about sex, but it's always better to know what the other person wants and ask for her consent. She might not be ready to have sex on the first night, and given the circumstances, both of you might be tired. Remember, you cannot enjoy having sex unless both are on the same page. Check out out our Adult dildo page which has everything adult shop related that you might need.
Pillow talk is important. Aside from kissing and other sexual activities, men can use their mouths for talking to their partner about what they want and what their partner likes. It's about being open and trusting.
"If you get to know yourself and your partner, you'll have a much more erotic and explosive sexual relationship," says Joy Davidson, a New York-based psychologist and sexologist, and the author of Fearless Sex.
Men may brag to friends and exaggerate the frequency of their sexual activity, but unlike women, men are less likely to talk about insecurities they have surrounding sex. The result is that men create distorted pictures of sexual frequency and prowess for themselves and one another.
According to Michael Castleman, a San Francisco-based sex expert and author of Great Sex: A Man's Guide to the Secret Principles of Total-Body Sex, the average frequency of sex in committed long-term relationships is roughly once every ten days.
"A lot of men wind up thinking that their sex life is missing something, that other men are having wilder sex or more frequent sex," Davidson says. "They have a sense that the pleasure ship has sailed and left them behind."
As time passes in a relationship, it's easy to get into a rut and just go through the motions, rather than express what you really want (and need) in bed. Sex therapist Williams Lucena, FMD, says it's time to break this cycle with some frank talk. "Ask each other, 'What do I need in bed from you?'" he suggests. "Get back to the communication you used to have."
Eat healthy
This doesn't sound like a sex tip, but treating your body right with good nutrition helps the whole body, including your libido, says Debbie Mandel, a stress management expert and author of Addicted to Stress. "Eat healthy foods to reduce cholesterol and keep your cardiovascular system humming," she adds. "This will ensure that circulation is at peak performance for the 'southern hemisphere.'" Check out out our Personal lube page which has everything adult shop related that you might need.
We know that not many men pay attention to personal hygiene and grooming. According to a survey conducted by Philips India, women prefer well-groomed men over good-looking ones. But you don't need a study to tell you that no one likes a stinky person, right?
As the famous saying goes, you are what you eat.
If you eat crap food, you'll feel like crap. If you eat healthy, whole, energizing foods, you'll feel like a healthy, whole, energized person.
Cut back on drinking, smoking, drugs, or overly processed foods. Double down on a colourful array of vegetables, nuts, lean animal proteins, and any supplements that make you feel awesome.
Focus on Pleasurable Sensations
Stress, anxiety, and distractions can lead to less satisfying sex. Leave the stress of the job at work and minimize your anxiety about your performance. "If we can quiet our monkey-minds, put a stop to that ceaseless inner-chatter, we can open ourselves up to better sex," Britton says.
She recommends that men adopt a mantra: FOPS, or Focus on Pleasurable Sensations. "Techniques are ranging from eye-gazing to massage and synchronized breathing that help keep you at the moment," Britton says. "Great sex happens in the present. It doesn't happen in the future, like worrying about how quickly you're going to come."
Our brains have two kinds of pleasure systems consummatory pleasure, an anticipatory pleasure.
Anticipatory pleasure is what we experience when we are in the state of desiring or craving something (for example, the hit of dopamine you get when you see your food being brought out to you in a restaurant).
Consummatory pleasure is the kind of pleasure that we experience when we (you guessed it) consume the thing we desire (food, sex, human touch, etc.).
Sexual tension (and a lot of sexual pleasure) is largely centred around being in a state of anticipation.
So, during foreplay, build up the sexual tension by going everywhere other than your partner's genitals first. For example, if your partner enjoys being kissed on the neck/shoulder area, then spend a few minutes lightly breathing on the nape of her back, behind her ear, and over the part of her shoulder where her bra strap would normally fall. Start very gently. Let your breath and lips do most of the work, to begin with, and simply graze her skin.
In the vast majority of your sexual play sessions, spend enough time on the preparatory phase that when you eventually go to put your fingers between her legs, you'll no doubt that she'll already be dripping wet by the time you touch her.
Kinky sex isn't just reserved for people adorned in leather in BDSM sex dungeons.
Try some light biting, hair pulling, or spanking with your partner (giving or receiving) and see what you like. You might be surprised.
Gift her with a sensual massage
Ahh, the art of the sensual massage!
If you want to give a woman the night of her life and turn her into a blissed-out puddle of love-mush (that will be talking to her friends about you for weeks afterwards), then look no further than the sensual massage.
Everybody likes sex, but the dynamic of a sensual massage is something entirely different. It's all about her receiving from you. Whether it's for an anniversary, a date, or just a Tuesday night, there is nothing else that will leave her feeling so honoured, nurtured, loved, and turned on. Set the scene, use some coconut oil, start gently, and escalate from there.
Do your household chores. Want to put your wife in the mood for better sex? "Help around the house," says Mandel. "The best foreplay happens outside the bedroom. By helping with chores and errands, you make them feel valued."
It's often hard to really turn off your mind if you're surrounded by chores and tasks on your to-do list. Honour yourself, your partner, and your relationship by removing as many distractions from your environment as possible. Pick up/do/fold the laundry. Tidy up. Vacuum. Take out the trash. Invest in mood lighting, music, or essential oil diffusers.
Boost your testosterone levels through lifestyle shifts
No article focused on sex tips for men would be complete without a little testosterone talk. Testosterone is the dominant hormone that affects your levels of sexual desire.
The most significant things that you can do to impact your testosterone levels positively are 1) prioritize 7-8 hours of quality sleep every night, 2) eat a nutrient-dense, whole food diet with ample vegetables and quality fats, and 3) do resistance training (weight lifting) 2-4 times per week focusing primarily on heavy compound lifts (such as squats, deadlifts, pull-ups, and bench press).
Help her lean into her ability to have G-spot orgasms
Much of the squirting literature out there reports that a minority of women (anywhere from 1-6% of women) can have squirting orgasms. In my personal experience and professional opinion, I would wager that over 80% of women can have squirting orgasms, given the right circumstances.
Help create the right situation in which your partner might be able to lean into her natural ability to have G-spot and squirting orgasms, by reading this deep-dive article on the subject.
Explicitly discuss your sexual fantasies with your partner
Do you know what your ideal sex life looks like? If you do, then it's time to communicate your desires to your partner.As connected as you might be to your significant other, they aren't a mind reader.Have an honest discussion about what it is that you like, and what you would like to try with them in the future.
Abstain a bit.
Abstinence as a sex tip? Believe it or not, it's a surefire way to improve sex and make your next encounter with your lover even more exciting. "Practice abstinence for a couple of days, a weekend, or a week," says Mandel. "Abstinence does make the heart grow fonder and makes you lust after forbidden fruit."
Don't blame yourself if your better half doesn't get an orgasm
If you don't already know how tricky female orgasm can be, you need to prepare yourself for that. If you are having sex for the first time, you would obviously want to make it a memorable experience for your wife a well. In case, she does not have an orgasm, don't blame yourself for it. Because a woman might not orgasm every time, she has sex.
When it comes to penis size, men always hear that size doesn't matter to women. While this may be the case for most, it's not so much about having the biggest penis as it fits with your partner. "I'm not going to pretend it doesn't matter," Davidson says. "There are plenty of women for whom it absolutely does. But I prefer to focus on the idea of the right fit."
People come in all shapes and sizes, and some fit better with each other. For many women, average-sized men are the best fit. This is usually a matter of personal preference. However, it's not something to get caught up in and worry about. Focus on foreplay – kissing, caressing, and other ways of giving pleasure – can lead to satisfying sex for men and women of all shapes and sizes.
Don't forget to talk to your partner, too. "A lot of women are very responsive to a man's voice during lovemaking," Davidson says. "If a man has a verbal facility and can entice a woman through his voice that can become a powerful part of his repertoire."
Want a foolproof way to drive her wild and ensure better sex? "Find a particular feature, and tell her that she is the best in this class," says Mandel.
Schedule Sex, Really!
It may sound mundane to schedule sex, but it can actually make it more relaxing with both partners having more realistic expectations. "There's this powerful mythology that says you should fall into each other's arms spontaneously, with string music playing and the sun setting in the West, and if that doesn't happen there's something wrong with you," Castleman says. "Nonsense. Real life doesn't work that way."
Scheduling sex can also eliminate conflict over desire differences and remove the pressure to perform. "People say, 'What if I'm not in the mood?' Well, one of the things about relationships is that you sometimes make compromises. But what astonishes people once they start scheduling sex is that they can actually enjoy it," says Castleman.
It may not sound that romantic, but Dr. Simmons says it's a great way to improve your sex life and satisfy women. Construct a plan for having sex, and he suggests: "Setting aside time or arranging opportunities for sex is very important, especially for busy couples or those with children. Don't let the frequency of sex dwindle due to fatigue or the inability to find the 'right time.'"
Switch things up
If you're experiencing a case of the "same-old, same-old," working on adding a little variety is the key to better sex, says Simmons. "Spice things up by planning and discussing variations on your usual sexual habits," he explains. "Lingerie, toys, new positions, and other creative additions can enhance intimacy and orgasm." This is one of the absolute best things you can do for your sex life if you're in a relationship.
So what is a spoiling session?A spoiling session is a magical, sexy, multi-purpose exercise that allows you to gain a deeper understanding of your own sexual needs and the sexual needs of your partner, while simultaneously reconnecting you as a couple and melting away the subtle shame and resistance that each partner may or may not have towards sex in general.
A spoiling session is a predetermined amount of time where one partner (the recipient) gets to have whatever they want to be done to them/on them/for them, as long as those things fall within the realm of comfort for the giving partner.
Kinky sex isn't just reserved for people adorned in leather in BDSM sex dungeons.
Try some light biting, hair pulling, or spanking with your partner (giving or receiving) and see what you like. You might be surprised.
Change the location.
Another way to add variety and improve sex life, suggests Mandel, is to try someplace new. "Do it in different places to experience different energy," she says. "Take it outdoors if you are overwhelmed with technology and want to get back your natural rhythm."
Sex, it's not just reserved for the bedroom!
In the shower, on the washing machine, in the bathroom, while getting ready in the morning, on the side of a hot tub, in your car while on a road trip the options are endless. I also have a client who reported pulling his wife's pants down and starting to go down on her when she was in the kitchen, making herself some food. Do with that information what you wish.
Want something even easier than tidying up your place and worrying about the neighbours/kids/pets? Many couples benefit from having an annual date night at a nice hotel. You don't have to worry about the social repercussions (assuming that the walls are decently sound-proofed), and you don't have to do the laundry when you leave. Enjoy!
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